Just Friends
by Mariel Nightstalker
Summary: Bella finds that true love can happen more than once. FEMSLASH Alice/Bella


**Just Friends**

Being a widow didn't feel like she thought it would. All the Hollywood movies and romantic books she'd ever read had convinced her that she would be near-suicidal and become a mere shadow of herself with nothing to live for.

The opposite happened. It was like she was a late blooming flower that unfurled her petals in one big rush, pushing her perfume into the world and displaying her colors for all to see. The newborn Vampire powers had faded, leaving her to examine her strengths from a critical standpoint.

Apparently, the virus had enhanced her problem-solving abilities that she normally used when studying and applied them to the rest of her life. From her new perspective, she could see that she was guilty of making a lot of bad decisions in her time. She could also see that Edward wasn't right for her. He was too controlling, too set in his ways to handle a young wife and child. Maybe it was for the best that he sacrificed himself to the Volturi in exchange for his daughter's life.

She re-named her daughter Antonia, a feminized version of his middle name, in honor of what he gave up for their sake. Antonia took her new name in stride, which was all that could be expected considering that she was only three years old at the time and didn't like being named Renesmee anyway.

Now, two years later, she was focused on getting her PhD in English Literature at Oxford and teaching Antonia how to appreciate the finer offerings of the literary world. Carlisle had said that it would be good for her to live on her own for a while, just her and Antonia, to get used to being an adult. This was after a year of making sure she wasn't suicidal or crazy, of course. She was grateful for his suggestion, since there was nothing quite like having your own schedule (as long as Antonia was taken care of) and doing things you loved day in and day out.

She _loved _school. The musty books in their library, the professors that would light up when she said something genuinely intelligent or interesting, and all the new smells of the school filled her with delight. With Alice babysitting Antonia when she was in class and having girl time when she wasn't, life was perfect. She became even closer to Alice than she'd been before, though she couldn't help but feel that there was some kind of boundary between them still, a final wall that she was determined to break through with time and persistence. When Antonia became old enough to be on her own more, Alice started visiting less and less. Bella could feel the walls coming back up, but acknowledged that she could break them down later, when Alice was more amenable.

She forced herself to enjoy life even without Alice living with her, and poured her energy into developing into an adult and raising her child.

Life continued to be perfect for about ten years, during which she flitted from school to school getting the finest education she could. She even learned how to prepare corpses for burial.

Finally she decided to take a break from her hectic schedule and go home for a little bit to enjoy being around the family again instead of just visiting briefly. The same day she returned home to her surrogate family, she fell in love again.

She wasn't expecting it when it happened or the person, but happens it did. She was welcomed back with open arms by Esme and Rosalie, told that the boys were out on a hunt, and sat down on the couch to regale her sisters and mother-figure with stories about all the things she'd seen and done the past decade. Half-way through a tidbit about the textiles of Turkey, she asked where Alice was. At first she'd thought that she was just picking out what to wear, but even Alice didn't take 3 hours to do that.

"Oh, she was in Sydney for the weekend closing a business deal. She'll be back tonight."

When they ran out of things to talk about, they went their separate ways.

Late that night, Bella got restless and slipped out of her room to go on a brief hunt in the woods. Since it was meant to be brief, she didn't bother to change out of the slip she slept in most nights. It was racier than anything she would have dared to consider when she human or married to Edward, but she loved the way it felt on her skin and there was no one to judge her.

Barefoot in the snow, she extended her senses and located a squirrel's nest several feet away. She expertly scaled the tree, opened the leafy nest, and broke the animal's neck before it could awaken. Drinking carefully so she wouldn't spill on her nightdress, she perched on the tree branch. The bark felt pleasant beneath her heels, and she curled her toes.

She'd learned to appreciate the little pleasant details of life. It made life seem more colorful, and staved off her boredom with life. Antonia kept her busy most days, but there were still those times when she'd be lying down or just doing something menial like the dishes and feel the ache of loneliness awaken inside her. Edward might not have been right for her, but he was still her first love and she missed his companionship. She missed the attention of a man, though she'd gotten plenty of offers from both genders throughout her travels. Oddly enough, she felt flattered and bored when a man made advances, but tingly and doubly flattered when a woman made her attraction clear.

Depositing the corpse back inside its nest and covering it up with leaves, she leapt back down and landed on her feet.

She would never get tired of the cat-like way she could move now.

The house was quiet when she returned. Vampires didn't need to sleep, but they still liked to rest or have private time during the night hours. Esme and Carlisle normally spent the evenings cuddled up in their big bed doing little projects together. It was one of their cute little couple things.

She could smell Rosalie and Emmett screwing around as quietly as they were able and snorted quietly. Jasper was sitting in the living room with his laptop cradled between his knees. He looked up when she passed and gave her a smile. She moved to sit beside him and asked,

"Did Alice come back yet?"

He nodded, "Yeah, she's in our room."

Bella raised her eyebrows. Jasper and Alice usually spent their evenings together having 'couple time' like everyone else. He ignored her look and focused on typing an email to a business associate in Wales. Peeking over his shoulder, she noted that he was writing in welsh instead of English.

She didn't try to talk again, content to sit there and watch him work. Jasper was quiet but soothing. He was the anti-Emmett, who was loud and exciting. After a while she felt him send out a trickle of emotion that expressed a desire to be alone. She got the hint and left, leaving him to his own devices.

He called out to her before she could climb the stairs.

"Alice and I are taking a break. Please go and keep her company for me. I know she missed you."

Bella soaked this in, chewing her lip. She never expected Jasper and Alice to be the couple that needed to take a break from each other. Emmett and Rose, maybe, but Alice? She pondered this as she climbed the stairs at a human pace. Reaching the top, she looked down the hall. Alice's room was the farthest away, being just beyond the bathroom and Carlisle's study and even the library.

It had been years since Bella last visited that room. Not since Edward's death had she been there, and she'd spent most of it sobbing into Alice's silk blouse. She'd ruined her sister's favorite shirt that day, but Alice assured her it didn't matter.

Biting her lip, she strolled down the hall to her door. There was the soft light of her favorite seashell lamp spilling out from under the door. Bella rested her forehead against the smooth wood, and then knocked gently.

She could smell her. She could even picture her, curled up on her little Victorian sofa with a fashion magazine or propped up against the bed frame with pillows, embroidering something pretty. Alice always was very ladylike. She liked pretty things and she liked to keep her hands clean.

Imagining her nimble fingers flipping pages or stabbing a gleaming needle in and out of a taut piece of fabric made something twitch inside her belly, and she felt warmer suddenly. Confused by this strange rush of feeling, she almost didn't notice when Alice opened the door. Alice giggled when Bella nearly lost her balance, the support of the door gone without warning. In the soft light, Bella looked at the woman she considered her best friend in the whole wide world. She wore an aquamarine robe and little pink socks. Even in dishabille, she was color-coordinated. Her face was the same, as fairy-like as always, but instead of messy spikes, a long rope of dark hair snaked around her shoulder and down the outside of her breast. Bella found her eyes drawn to it. She decided Alice should become a hair model.

"Well, are you going to stand in the hallway staring at me all night or are you going to come in like a proper sister?" Alice teased, reaching out and poking her in the shoulder. Bella's trance broke, and she swept her sister into a hug before she could make any objections. No complaints about her hair were forthcoming, and Alice's thin arms slipped easily around her. Because of her diminutive stature, her head always settled perfectly between Bella's breasts, much like Antonia used to when she was a baby and Bella would hold her in her arms.

They held each other for a long time, silently acknowledging that it had been too long. When they pulled apart, Alice gave her a once-over and then chirped,

"You look great!"

Bella snorted, "It's the nightdress, not me. I look the same as I always do."

Alice pulled her into her room and sat her on the bed, "No, you don't. You look different; freer, somehow. I'd thought you would look stressed because of dear sweet mischievous Antonia, not as fresh as a flower."

Bella had been right. On the bed was a half-finished bird of paradise and the pillows were piled against the headboard. She settled against them, the down cradling her. She knew logically that her room had the same kind of pillows, but Alice's felt better. She sniffed, and her eyes narrowed when she couldn't catch a lingering hint of Jasper's scent.

They really _were _taking a break.

"That's nice of you to say. You look good too. I like your hair like that."

She was immediately hyper-aware that she'd just smashed one of the walls when Alice's eyes lit up and her smile became brighter. Alice moved to lounge beside her, and their shoulders and arched knees brushed. Two more walls broke.

Alice quickly updated her on everything she'd been working on, reaching down to pick up the project. She plucked at the finished stitches before beginning to fill in some orange plumage with silk thread. Bella watched her work, not really listening. Alice's hands were lightning quick and graceful in the lamplight. Bella glanced down at her legs, seeing that the folds of her robe had parted on one side, revealing a stretch of leg all the way up to her hip.

Her mouth was inexplicably uncomfortably dry.

She looked away when Alice glanced over at her once she'd finished her spiel of activities. She looked at her dresser and admired her abalone hair combs. She'd worn them at her wedding.

"Bella?"

It was time for another wall to go down. "Why are you and Jasper taking a break?"

Alice sighed and tucked her head into the curve of Bella's shoulder like she used to do in Venice when they would watch the sunsets together. Bella laced their fingers together and rested her head on top of hers. She waited for her to speak as patiently as she could, trying not to let her tension show. Had she pushed too hard?

"We don't love each other any more."

She whispered it so quietly that for a moment Bella wasn't sure she'd heard her. When it finally registered, her neurons went a little crazy, popping and forming new connections left and right. Her lips parted silently in shock.

Alice squeezed her fingers and drew in a shaky breath. Bella turned her attention back to her and bodily pulled her into her lap. Alice didn't object, curling up against her and letting herself show her grief for the loss of feelings that they'd both thought would endure forever. It's always jarring to have a love end.

They sat like that for hours, lulled into a sort of peacefulness. Bella's skirts had bunched up around her waist, but Alice was in the way so covering herself up wasn't possible. Alice trailed her hand up and down her waist to her hip and back, and then let her fingers stray farther to graze her leg. Bella didn't breathe as her pearly nails lightly scratched circles on her pale flesh, rubbing it with her thumb afterwards.

She was fairly certain that Alice was just doing this unconsciously, that it didn't mean anything…

The fingers trailed slowly over the rounded curve of her thigh and into the little dip between Bella's splayed leg and where Alice was nestled against her. She lowered her entire hand and flexed her fingers, squeezing and caressing the silky skin of her inner thigh. Bella let out a whimper and would have blushed if she could. Instead of snatching her hand away like she'd expected, Alice continued to stroke her and even began to creep higher up to the juncture of her pelvis and leg.

Bella wasn't sure what to think of this development, but she had a strong feeling that this was the final wall between them crumbling. She'd wondered what it was that they hadn't shared. She supposed it should have been obvious. They shared their feelings, their thoughts, their lives, their secrets, but not their bodies.

Alice shuffled around so that she was on her knees facing Bella. Her hand was still now, just resting on her thigh. Bella met her eyes and held them. Neither moved for several minutes, and then Alice slowly leaned in, her eyes questioning. Bella met her halfway, and their lips connected.

Her hand slid up her leg to curl around her hipbone. Bella slid her hands into her hair, mussing her braid, and just let herself feel.

She remembered her fascination with the way she crossed her legs and a desire to bury her face in her lap, in her skirts. She remembered that one time they were rushed and had to share a shower, bumping and giggling in the tiled bathroom. She remembered watching Alice hold Antonia in her arms and name all the colors of a brilliant rainbow and how her heart soared at the sight of them together.

Alice broke their kiss and rested their foreheads together, nuzzling their noses together.

"Jasper and I might not love each other anymore, but I love _you_."

"How…how long?"

"Years. Since you walked down the aisle with my brother, and I realized I wanted to be the one you were walking to."

"Oh…"

Alice kissed her again. When they parted again, Bella gasped out,

"I love you too."

~000~

End Just Friends

Soppy and sappy, yes, but hey…


End file.
